Day 31 - BONUS DAY - What have you learned in the last year?

Day 30 - Your favorite song

I don't ever have one favorite song.  Heck, I have several DAYS of music in my iTunes and I LOOOOOVE every single track.  But, I have favorite songs in moments... so here's one for now.

I love this song... I have a version on my iTunes that I like better, but I do love it when Michael McLean sings it.  It's a little more realistic sounding.

Day 29 - In this past month, what have you learned?

This question feels a lot like, "What did you do on your summer vacation?" :-)  Well... too much to write about on the sheet of notebook paper you just handed me, actually.  So I'll pick a few tidbits and share them with you.

I learned that I am me.  Still, and always, ME.  I love me!  I lost me for a while there, but I found me again.  I am a happy girl, truly.  I don't like drama, and I don't try to create it.  But I do have the capacity to DEAL with said drama.  I'm happy to have my family around and I know that they'll be there for me always... no matter what.  I know just EXACTLY how lucky I am to have that blessing.  I learned that I am loved by my Father in Heaven, and that He's got a plan for my life.  Blessedly, I have received confirmation that I am indeed following that plan.  And He's proud of me.  That's an amazing feeling, really.

I have had a GOOD December.  I'm looking forward to the months and YEAR ahead!

Day 28 - A picture of you from last year and now - How have you changed?

July, 2010

I was at my heaviest weight, I was pretty unhappy, I was not doing well emotionally... and I wasn't telling anyone.  What a sad me!  :-(  The cool part of this picture is that roughly ten years earlier, I was standing in this exact same spot... :-)  But I was WAY cuter that time than the time pictured.  DC humidity was wreaking HAVOC on my hair.  Normally, that was a cute little pixie cut, but the humidity turned it into a fluffy "mom" 'do.  :-/  Oh well!

December, 2011

I'm happy, I'm healthy, I'm pregnant, and I'm looking forward to a new year with no mistakes in it yet!  I love my body and the amazing things it's doing.  I'm STILL a good 10-20 lbs lighter in this picture (with my 6 mo. pregnant belly, mind you) than I was in that picture from last year...  I got down to 125, my goal weight, right before I found out I was pregnant... and proceeded to drop down to around/below 120 due to morning sickness.  Don't worry, I've gained it ALL back now.  Lol!  And strangely enough, I kinda like the way I look... I don't want to keep this adorable belly around when there's no baby in it ;-) but I like it while Baby Bug's here.  :-)

Fact of the matter is, I've changed a whole heck of a lot in the last year.  I went through Hell... literally.  Rodney Atkin's knows what I mean...

That song got me through a few times.  But really, what REALLY got me through the tough times was the Lord.  I would NOT have made it without Him.  Divorce is awful.  Ask anyone who's been through one.  Not the plan, nope.  And it hurts.  And it's really hard to do when you're pregnant.  But sometimes, just sometimes, it's for the best in the long run.  Little Bug and I will be fine, and I know that for a fact, because the Lord has assured me of that on a frequent basis.

The funny thing about going through Hell, or a Refiner's Fire, or whatever you would like to call it?  You end up stronger on the other end.  :-)

Day 27 - Why you are doing this 30 day challenge

I am doing this 30 day challenge for a number of reasons.

1. My blog was SORELY lacking in posts.  And nobody really knew anything about me.  Lamesauce.
2. I decided to break my "internet anonymity" by "outing" myself online.  This seemed like a good way to do that.
3. If I truly want to have my blog printed into a book someday, it might be nice to actually have some stuff ABOUT me... :-)
4. I like to do memes.

Yup.  That about sums it up.

Day 26 - What do you think about your friends?

Honestly... that about sums it up.  :-)  My friends, like the Muppets, are an eclectic bunch.  They're a little weird, a little crazy, and a LOT awesome.  And I wouldn't get by without 'em.

Day 25 - What I would find in your bag

• Wallet
• Two flavors of gum, always a fruity kind and a minty kind
• iPhone earbuds... broken... got new ones today
• Purple pen
• Black pen
• Regular strength Tylenol (no Extra-Strength for preggies!)
• Lotion
• 2 lipsticks, 2 lip balms, 1 lip gloss and 1 eyeliner
• Keys
• iPhone

Day 24 - A letter to your parents

Day 23 - Something you crave often

Day 22 - What makes you different from everyone else?

I love being rained on... especially when I'm wearing my big, black, polka-dot rain boots.  I like to suck on sour skittles.  I run because it makes me feel like I'm flying.  It's not actually "fun" and I'm not doing it for health reasons... I run because it makes me feel like I'm little, on the playground, and flying.  I want to be a nurse, mainly because there need to be people at the hospital who actually make patients feel like they matter.  I've had those nurses, now I want to BE one of those nurses.  I don't like to look "trendy".  I'm not trying to dress for how people see me... but I do like to be seen :-)  And not in a creepy way.  I just like to feel like I matter enough to be noticed, not blend into the background.  I really like science.  And I'm starting to really like math.

Day 21 - A picture of something that makes you happy

Day 20 - Someone you see yourself marrying or being with in the future

Well... I'm not marrying this little person... but I'll definitely be with them in the future.  Yup.  Those little feet will be with me for a good long while.  And THAT is all you GET about THAT.

Because frankly... it's too soon after my divorce for me to be naming names, or speculating, or anything of that nature.  I can tell you that I won't be marrying anyone in 2011.  I don't have any plans for marriage anytime soon.  I can, however, tell you some characteristics of the man I hope will be that special guy...

• He's gotta be patient.  With me, with my baby, with my family, with everything.
• He's gotta be kind.  No guile allowed.
• He needs to honor the covenants he makes.  He needs to VALUE the Gospel, and put God WAY above me and the kids.  If God's more important than anything else, all else will be fine.
• He needs to be able to laugh.  At the silly things, at the stupid things, at the frustrating things.
• He needs to have a good work ethic, and be willing to do the lame work if it's what needs doing.
• He need to be respectful.
• He should make me laugh.
• He should open doors, because chivalry is only dead when we let it be.
• He should make a good living, and be able to support a family.
• He should be able to let things slide.  Pick his battles, if you will.

Those are the things I'm looking for.  Handsome as all get out, killer eyes, and "gives good hugs" are also nice... but not 100% necessary.  Just really nice to have.  ;-)

Day 19 - Nicknames you have and why you have them

Aubby-Dobby - This is what my papa calls me.  :-)  He's called me that forever.

Aubs - This is what my little brudder calls me.  And again, he's called me that forever.

Bri/Bri-Bri - My 'Llanna calls me Bri-Bri or Bri... so does her momma, so do many of our mutual friends.

JuJuBri - This one hails from my Becca-Boo.  :-)  Since 9th grade.

Aubbie - I get this one a lot from a lot of people...

Baby - My granddad used to call me this... and it's what he called my momma too.  :-)

Awoo/WaWoo/LaRue - This is my momma.  It started with LaRue... then became "WaWoo" and then just AWOOOOO!  It's fun to howl...

Day 18 - List some plans, dreams, and goals that you have

I've actually had a really tough time with the concept of plans, dreams, and goals this year.  It seems like whenever I make a plan, dare to dream, or state a goal, they don't happen.  Not for lack of trying, but because Heavenly Father loves me and has better plans for me.  But... it still makes me leery of stating my plans, dreams, and goals.  Here's my list anyways...

• I know that I want to finish my pre-req's for nursing school, get accepted to nursing school, and then GRADUATE from nursing school.
• I know that I want to get my bachelor's in nursing, preferably online while working as a nurse.
• I know that I want to get my MASTERS in nursing, become a Certified Nurse Midwife, or a Nurse Anesthetist, and be able to pay off all my school debts and take good care of my family.
• I know that I want to have this sweet baby without any UNNECESSARY interventions (the necessary ones are fine!) and hopefully sans epidural.
• I know that I want to raise this sweet baby in a loving, and nurturing environment.
• I know that (someday) I want to be able to be on my own with this sweet baby, truly on my own two feet again.

And... those are kinda my only real plans, dreams, and goals for just now.  I'll do my annual New Year's Resolutions post on New Years Day... :-)

Day 17 - Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why

I think it would be really awesome to have a day with Audrey Hepburn.  I don't think I'd want to switch lives with her, but I do think it would have been awesome to spend a day with her.  She was such a bright, pretty, beautiful, woman.  I would have loved to see how she was off the screen.

Day 16 - Another picture of yourself

Day 15 - Put your ipod or shuffle on-first 10 songs that play

Oh, this oughta be good... :-)  I have QUITE an eclectic iTunes collection.  Ecclectic, and extensive.  Since it's the holidays, there will be lots of Christmas music scattered in there too.  :-)

1. Caring Hands - Felicia Day - Dr. Horrible's Singalong Blog Soundtrack
2. Glamourous - Fergie
3. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas - Rosemary Clooney
4. Back To December - Taylor Swift
5. One of Those Lives - Brad Paisley
6. Silver Bells - Dean Martin
7. Oh, My Soul Hungered - Reprise
8. Cleaning This Gun (Come on In, Boy) - Rodney Atkins
9. Blow - Ke$ha
10. Lullaby - OneRepublic

Not bad, not bad... :-)

Day 14 - A picture of you and your family

Day 13 - A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

I actually really don't like this question.  I don't want to talk about being hurt.  :-/  Is that so wrong?

I've actually been hurt quite a lot in the last six months, and I've done a darn good job of not dwelling on it.  While I have written some very therapeutic letters to those who have hurt me, I choose not to post them on the internet.

Just suffice it to say, if you hurt me... that wasn't nice.  I don't like being gossiped about, ignored, lied to, or made fun of.  Pretty sure you don't either.  Please play nice on the playground... and that is all.

Day 12 - How you found out about blogging and why you have a blog

This post was originally posted about a year ago on another blog of mine.  Rather than rewriting the same post over again, I figured I'd just post this one again!  The reasons are still the same.  And this was a pretty good post, really.

See this gorgeous girl I'm hugging' on?  This is Naomi.  She's been my buddy since 9th grade.  You can blame her for my blogging.  When we were 14, she showed me her blog.  I was intrigued!  A diary?  Online?  AWESOME!  I have now been blogging for about 12 years.  Back in the day, before the internet got all fancy I even wrote my own HTML code for that blog.  I made a new blog every few months, when I got tired of people who I didn't want reading it having easy access to my thoughts.  Why it never occurred to me to just make it a private blog, I will never know!  But anyways, Naomi is the one who first told me about blogging.

Fast forward a few years.  Elder M. Russell Ballard gave a commencement address in 2007 at BYU-Hawaii.  He talked about the importance of using the internet for good, and how members of the church can use their personal blogs, Twitter accounts, Facebook accounts and other types of social media to stand as examples of what it really means to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints today.  He invited members of the church to join the conversation on the internet.  You can read the talk here.  Or even watch a clip of the talk below.

This talk has been mentioned by other LDS bloggers, but it truly affected me.  I've become a lot more open about my faith online now.  It's a big part of my life, and I love to share what I believe.  I love having conversations and discussions about what I believe, and learning about what other people believe.  Why not do that on my blog?

Another reason that I blog is to have a record of my life.  I have always, always kept a journal.  I may not write every day, or even consistently.  But I do write.  I also have this blog.  Someday, I'd like to scan all of my old diaries and put them into one book.  I'd like to print these blogs out, and bind them.  I want to have my remembrances in one place, rather than 15!  I blog to preserve my story, and hopefully, to leave something behind for my progeny.   

Day 11 - Another picture of you and your friends

Day 10 - Songs you listen to when you're bored, happy, sad, mad, etc.

Ahhh, songs...  :-)  I like to think my life is a movie, or a TV episode, and there's always the perfect score running quietly in the background.

Here are some of my current favorites (this week) Click the links for video, or hit play on the ones that are embedded.

Regina Spektor - Fidelity

Blake Shelton - Honey Bee






That one?  Strange Charm?  The incredibly awesome Hank Green... I <3 him...

Day 9 - Something you're proud of in the past few days

So... I took a little hiatus.  To memorize lines and pass all my classes, if you read that LAST 30-day Challenge post I did.  But I'm BACK now... with a brand new attitude.  :-D

Something I'm proud of in the past few days... hmmm... how about...

I PASSED ALL MY CLASSES!!!!!!!


Seriously!  To all the people who say that going back to school after six and a half years means nothing but hardship and struggle, you can shut it.  :-)  And I mean that in the nicest of ways.  Yes, this was a harrrrrd term, made harder by my crazy life events, BUT!  I DID IT!  :-D  And I'm dang proud of myself.

Momma's got a brand new attitude...

My awesome friend Ashley posted a really neat blog post today.  She talked about living below your privileges, and it really struck me.  She's a rockstar.

But it got me thinking... Mainly about how I'm not ashamed of my past.  I'm not proud of a lot of it, and I'm sad about some of it, but I've certainly learned a lot from it.  And... maybe it's okay if I'm "out" on the internet.  Maybe it's okay if I let you know who I am.  Maybe it's okay if I stop hiding, because... that sorta makes it look like I'm ashamed of who I am.  The whole reason I was hiding behind the anonymity of this blog was because I was afraid that people would be watching me, and reading me, and knowing who I am... and there are a couple people I would prefer NOT to know my everyday comings and goings.  But... that's kinda silly.  I have so many friends and family that are scattered abroad, and blogs are how we keep in touch a lot of the time.

I still plan on keeping "internet names" for me and mine.  And I'm still on the fence about putting up Baby Bug's image on the web.  But... Maybe it's not so bad if I start sharing my blog.  :-)  Enough people have asked, that maybe it's time.  So... here goes.

My name is Aubri.  I'm 25, I am a single mom.  My ex-husband and I divorced in my first trimester.  I don't talk much about him, because that's his business.  I don't talk much about our marriage and divorce because he's a private person, and I respect his privacy enough to leave it at that.  It's not just MY story, it's his story too.  And he chooses to keep his stories OFF the web, so out of respect for him, I keep it off my corner of the web.  I hope that everyone else would respect him enough to leave him out of my internet life as well.  I will never tolerate anyone slamming him, his character, or his family.

Hello internet.  I'm here to make my case, and present myself to the world.  Aubri, The Lemon Momma... out and proud.

Day 8 - Short term goals for this month and when you'll accomplish them

Since I'm mid-month here, I'll do November AND December.

-Pass my classes (First week of December)
-Have ALL my lines fully memorized for the play (Thanksgiving weekend)


Actually... that's about it.  :-)

Day 7 - A picture of someone/something that has had the biggest impact on you

Let's do this from left to right, clockwise.  :-)

First and foremost, my Savior.  He has been, by far, the person with the most impact on my life.  He loves me, and for that I am eternally grateful.  He chose to atone for our sins.  Not just those who accept that sacrifice, but EVERYONE'S.  It doesn't matter if you don't believe in His existence.  It doesn't matter if you know He's there, but sin anyway... He still atoned for your sins.  I'm forever in awe of Him.  His love for me, His compassion, His ability to forgive all my craziness... He's always there.  My favorite story from His life?  Luke, chapter 11, specifically verses 1-44.  That link will take you to it.  I love that story because the Savior grieves with Mary and Martha... exactly the way each sister needs Him to.  It shows His true depth of understanding of EACH of us, on an individual level.  He's amazing.

Next, the Bible and the Book of Mormon.  These two books have literally changed my life.  I wouldn't be who I am today without them.  If you haven't read them, I encourage you to request a free copy.  For a free copy of the Bible, click here.  For a free copy of the Book of Mormon, click here.

After that, we have Joseph Smith.  The prophet.  This man has done so much for the world, and I love him for the sacrifices he made.  He was a human being, a man, called of God to bring forth a work He had in mind for His children.  What a humbling calling that must have been.  Read more about Joseph Smith here.

That adorable couple on the far right?  Two of my favorite people in the entire world.  Gordon B. Hinckley and Marjorie Pay Hinckley.  Presdient Hinckley was the prophet and leader of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for most of my childhood.  His example, his testimony, and his lighthearted sense of humor still stays with me, even after his passing.  His sweet wife, Sister Hinckley is still one of my favorite examples of motherhood, love, and strength.   For a brief video honoring Sister Hinckley, click here.  For a brief video of President Hinckley sharing a lesson he learned as a boy, click here.

Last, but not least, we have the Rexburg Idaho LDS Temple.  That beautiful building at the top of the hill was my beacon for the time that I lived in Rexburg.  A constant reminder that the Lord loves His children, that families ARE forever, and that He wants us to return home to Him... that temple was MY temple.  I went as often as I could, sometimes several times per week.  I miss it.  I love that place.

Day 6 - Favorite superhero and why

Iron Man.

Because seriously?  Why not?

Okay, I'll get real.  I love Iron Man for a number of reasons.  He's Marvel's bad-a, playboy, rich kid, genius who doesn't give a flying fig what anybody thinks about him.  He's like Batman with less angst.  ;-)  I like Tony Stark because he's enough of his father's son to get him places, while still being enough of his own brand of bad-a.  :-)  I like that in a man.  Honestly though, I like Iron Man BEST when he's with the rest of The Avengers.  Captain America is pretty bad-a too... and I respect him for his integrity and honor, things that Tony's kinda lacking.  It's really hard for me to narrow down one superhero though.  These guys were my childhood pals.  It's like asking a mom to choose her favorite child.  VERY hard.

Day 5 - A picture of somewhere you've been

Day 4 - A habit that you wish you didn't have

I'm reeeeally bad at e-mail procrastination.  Nine times out of ten, I get people's e-mails on my phone.  Usually when I'm in the middle of something.  Same thing goes for Facebook messages.  Usually, these are e-mails and messages I really ought to respond to.  But... I'm busy!  So I say, "Later!  I'll have more time later!" and then... it's been a week and I'm going, "OH NOES! TEH E-MAIL!!!"  Yeah.  Not effective communication skills.  And then the person who I should have e-mailed back is all, "What the heck?  Am I not important to you AT ALL!?!?!

Whoops.

My other habit I don't love?  Trashy TV.  :-)  I looooove me some trashy TV.  I'll gladly (and guiltily!) watch hours and hours of Gossip Girl, Sex and the City, and the Real Housewives of New York.  I don't even know WHY I care about them.  They are ALL fictional characters.  But it's a good mindless distraction.  Thank heavens for DVR.  I would NEVER watch those shows around mah preshus baybees.  I mean, technically, my only baby is still inside me, so I guess he or she is watching with me... scary.  But... I haven't actually had any TIME to watch trashy TV during this pregnancy, so I think we're good.  :-)

Day 3 - A picture of you and your friends

(Okay... so... I'll be back later with a REAL "picture" of my friends and me.  You'll see.  For now, enjoy this picture of kittens.)

Day 2 - The meaning behind your Blog name

LemonDropLoving... that's my blog address...
The Lemon Momma... that's how I sign my blogs...
Breathe, Step, Trust... that's my blog title...

Not entirely sure which one of these you want me to define, so how about all of them?!

I chose "Lemon Drop Loving" as my blog address because of a few reasons.  I've always been a fan of lemon drops.  Since I was little.  I love the sweet and sour flavors, the crunchiness when you get too impatient to keep sucking on them, how they have little air bubbles that kinda cut your tongue if you're not careful... I love everything about them.  To me, they taste like summer car trips and school bus rides.  They taste like childhood.  I will never STOP loving them.  They also remind me of Albus Wulfric Percival Brian Dumbledore.  They were his favorite muggle sweet.  And... at the time I created this blog, I was pretty newly pregnant, and lemon drops were my first real craving, and a good nausea deterrent.

I chose "The Lemon Momma" as my signature/blogger name because it fits me.  I'm not your conventional fruit.  Most people wouldn't like to just take a big ol' honkin' bite outta me... but I add good flavor to most situations.  And I'm really pleasant when I'm all sweetened up.  I know I'm not everyone's cup of tea (but I do tend to be more enjoyable with a cup of tea), and I may not do everything the way everyone else would do it... but I am a pretty handy fruit to have around.  I'm versatile, if you will.

And finally, "Breathe, Step, Trust..."  That one comes from one of my favorite quotes by Richard Bach,

“When you have come to the edge of all the light you have
And step into the darkness of the unknown
Believe that one of the two will happen to you
Either you'll find something solid to stand on
Or you'll be taught how to fly!”  

This blog has been a huge leap for me.  I started it, quite literally, standing at the edge of everything I knew, all the light I had... and I took that step into the darkness.  This is that step.  But it's also about the emotions going into that step.  I take my deep breath, I take my step, and I trust that I'm either going to soar, or I'm going to be on solid ground.  Breathe, step, trust...

Day 1 - Recent picture of you and 15 random facts about yourself

(need a little more explanation?  It's a meme... clickety on over here for the juicy deets!)


Recent picture of me, eh?  Hmmm...  How about, THIS one!?  I took it today, and it's of my feet... so I think that qualifies.

1. I have Celiac disease.  This means that gluten (the protein found in grains like wheat, spelt, barley and rye) is poison to my body.  Interestingly enough, instead of just going, "Ew!  Yicky!  Flush that crap OUT!" my body actually goes, "DEATH to the INVADER!!!!  And fights it off like an infection.  Ridiculously huge, full-scale immune battle-mode response which includes attacking the villi in my intestines and trying to kill THEM simply because they're trying to absorb those nutrients.  Poor villi, it's not THEIR fault.  Celiac sucks.  But eating gluten free?  That totally does NOT suck.  It's yummy, and now the food I love actually loves me back.
2. I am a self-proclaimed "iAddict"  :-)  I proudly own three iPods, an iPhone, and a MacBook Pro.  Steve Jobs (may he rest in peace) was an icon, a genius, and a friend to millions.
3. I love makeup.  LOVE, love makeup.  I've done everything from professional makeup artistry to selling cosmetics with my Mary Kay business.  It's kinda my outlet.  LOVE it.  You can usually tell my mood by looking at my makeup. ;-)
4. I cook when I'm angry.  For example?  I was supposed to bring a dish to a potluck on Monday.  As in ONE.  It was a bad day... I started with one... and then it quickly turned into three.  Lol.  Like I said, I cook when I'm angry.
5. When I'm in a bad mood, there are a few movies that will usually pull me out.  Mean Girls and Easy A have been my go-to movies lately.  Heh.  They're just funny.  And RIDICULOUSLY quotable.
6. That leads me to my next point... Movies.  I own nearly 300 DVD's.  And I've seen them ALL.  And I watch them ALL over and over again.  I love me some movies.
7. I love comics, and comic book movies, and superheroes, and super villains.  :-)
8. I had mainly guy friends growing up, as in... from birth.  This means I love Star Wars (and have proudly called someone a nerf herder and meant it) and Transformers, and sports, and Xbox, and other such boyish things.
9. I'm pregnant, and I actually REEEEALLY enjoy being pregnant.  This is probably the most insanely awesome I've ever felt about my body.  Sure, I whine about things... but really, in my head?  I follow it up (most of the time) with, "I am a freaking ROCKSTAR!  I'm making a BABY in here!"
10. I set custom ringtones for people that either make me think of them, or make me  laugh when I hear them.  Like, my parent's text tones for example?  My mom's is "IT'S SO FLUFFY!!!" from Despicable Me, and my dad's is Darth Vader saying, "I AM YOUR FATHER!" heh... makes me giggle every time.
11. As much as I enjoy long walks on the beach... I prefer long RUNS on the beach.  I really enjoy running, anywhere and everywhere.  It's hard to do while pregnant... but I do really love it.
12. I will gladly pack my own backpack into the woods and camp out for a week or more.  I mean, I'm as girlie as they come... when I want to be, but if you can't drop the makeup and curling iron for an extended period of time... there's something seriously wrong with you.  I love to be outdoors, and I love to be all rough and tough with the best of 'em.
13. I kind of hate the number 13.  I'm not triskaidekaphobic or anything... but I just think 13 is a sucky number.  And don't give me that "Baker's Dozen" crap.  I don't want to hear it.  That baker can't count.  
14.  (I just realized that I've written this list out like a 14 year old on a sugar high.  Yes.  That's a fairly accurate description for my standard thought process.  The Avril Lavigne I'm cranking in the background probably isn't helping my maturity level.)  I listen to lots of types of music.  I don't really have one genre that I like more than others.  My iTunes on shuffle is crazy.  It'll go from Yo Yo Ma to Nicki Minaj to Billy Joel to Tim McGraw.  I like music.
15. I absolutely love Ellen Degeneres.  That woman makes me happy inside.  I love the insanely quirky/happy drum she marches to, I love her cute show, I love that she has adorable youtube kids on as guests... I love Dory from Finding Nemo... I just think Ellen is a rockstar.  I would LOVE to be on her show, simply so I could dance my entrance.  Ten bucks says I do a better job than Obama did ;-)  He's been an alright president, but my dance entrance on Ellen would be cooler.  Just saying.

And... that my friends is Day One.  :-)  And now... I'm going to take my pregnancy-induced insomniac butt up to bed.  I probably won't sleep... but I'm becoming an EXPERT at finding patterns in the texturing material on the walls.

Getting to know you, getting to know all about you...

This little thing has been going around the blogosphere... so I'm jumping on the bandwagon.  Kinda like Pinterest ;-)  Here goes!

Day 1 - Recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
Day 2 - The meaning behind your Blog name
Day 3 - A picture of you and your friends
Day 4 - A habit that you wish you didn't have
Day 5 - A picture of somewhere you've been
Day 6 - Favorite superhero and why
Day 7 - A picture of someone/something that has had the biggest impact on you
Day 8 - Short term goals for this month and when you'll accomplish them
Day 9 - Something you're proud of in the past few days
Day 10 - Songs you listen to when you're bored, happy, sad, mad, etc.
Day 11 - Another picture of you and your friends
Day 12 - How you found out about blogging and why you have a blog
Day 13 - A letter to someone who has hurt you recently
Day 14 - A picture of you and your family
Day 15 - Put your ipod or shuffle on-first 10 songs that play
Day 16 - Another picture of yourself
Day 17 - Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why
Day 18 - List some plans, dreams, and goals that you have
Day 19 - Nicknames you have and why you have them
Day 20 - Someone you see yourself marrying or being with in the future
Day 21 - A picture of something that makes you happy
Day 22 - What makes you different from everyone else?
Day 23 - Something you crave often
Day 24 - A letter to your parents
Day 25 - What I would find in your bag
Day 26 - What do you think about your friends?
Day 27 - Why you are doing this 30 day challenge
Day 28 - A picture of you from last year and now - How have you changed?
Day 29 - In this past month, what have you learned?
Day 30 - Your favorite song

For the record, when it comes to posting pictures of myself... I don't do that.  So... you'll get pictures of me, but not of my face.  A girl is entitled to SOME secrets, after all!  ;-)

What I miss about The City...

This is what I miss about my City... All of this.  Might be the pregnancy hormones, but I teared up a bit while watching this.  I want to go home... home to a place that was never really my home... but now that I'm gone?  It sure feels like it was.

Something Old...

Ten years ago last August, my maternal grandmother passed away.  It was a really tough time for me.  Her passing was a beautiful and spiritual occasion, and it brought us together as a family in a way that nobody but she could have possibly done.  She was seriously a rockstar.  I have a LOT of happy memories from that time.  Weird, I know.  :-)

After she passed, we got to do the whole tear apart the house, sort everything out, prepare things for donation and being given to the children as per her will etc. etc. etc.  Her craft room became a sort of... sorting place.  Towards the end, mom said that I could run up and look through her costume jewelry and if I saw anything I liked, I could probably have it.  Now, there was some AWESOME stuff in her costume jewelry collection.  Fun cocktail rings, great necklaces, amazing pins... she had amazing taste, and a fun and eclectic sense of style.  She could pull off a big bling-y cocktail ring and make it look expensive.  She was just that classy.  So... I was a little more than excited to sort through these treasures and find something tangible and wearable to remember her by.

Digging through the little clear acrylic divider boxes, I found a little tiny chunk of silver-colored metal.  It was round... so I assumed it must be a ring, but it certainly didn't look like any other ring I'd ever seen.  For starters, it didn't have any stones.  It was just... metal.  It had three flat holes in it, and some delicate looking, vintage-y scrollwork on the sides.  I was entirely transfixed.  I knew enough in my 15 year old mind to know that this HAD to be important, and definitely NOT just costume jewelry.

I took it to my mom, and said, "I think I want... this."  Her eyes got a little wider, and she quietly said, "Where did you find that?"  I showed her the box, and she smiled, and pretty soon we were showing it to the aunts and my Grandad and as it turned out... this was no ordinary ring.  I had found my great grandmother's wedding ring.  Grandad's mom.  My great grandmother, Vera, was born in 1893... on Indian Territory in Oklahoma.  She married my great-grandfather, Frank, in 1916 in Portland, OR.  Of course, that's only part of their story... but the neat thing about life, is that we leave little pieces of ourselves behind for those who come after us.  We're all tied together.  And I had found her ring... everyone had thought it had been lost.  Nobody knew what had happened to it.  And I'd found it, inside a box, in another box, in Mimi's costume jewelry. 

It had (at some point) had its stones removed.  This is pretty common with antique jewelry, so I'm told.  I took it to a jeweler who specialized in restoring antique jewelry, and he informed me that the side stones were likely heart shaped, as evidenced by what was remaining of the prongs.  He said that someone had ground off the prongs... which isn't the best way of removing stones from a setting, but that it wasn't irreparably damaged.

Here's some of that gorgeous, vintage detail I was talking about.  Can you imagine?  This ring is nearing 100 years old... 

Also, same size as my finger... because, you know... genetics.  :-)

(Also, also... ON my finger... because I am A GIRL and it's what WE DO.)

I'm really excited to eventually get this beautiful ring restored.  I have NO idea how much something like that would cost.  I do know that I have two diamond wedding sets and a diamond necklace that need to find new homes... and I would be MORE than happy to let the jeweler take them in trade for newer, better, and prettier stones for this gorgeous ring.  I love that someday this ring won't sit empty, like a sad little skeleton.  But it's going to be happy and loved again.  Someday.

Fall Bucket List!

I totally meant to do this back in September.  But I didn't... So I'm going to blog it now.


I want to state for the record that AUTUMN is my favorite time of year.  Truly, NOTHING beats the majesty that is Autumn in New York... they don't write songs about Autumn in Oregon for a reason.  But... this year?  This year I want to do all the things, the FALL kinds of things, that I didn't get to do in years past.  These are things that I think should be mandatory for each and every autumn... but I didn't get to do them as often as I would have liked.  Oh, and these are in NO particular order.  Just spouting 'em off as I remember them.

• Corn maze, preferably in the dark.  Corn mazes are ALWAYS more fun in the dark.  People jumping out and saying "BOO!" are optional.
• Pumpkin carving
• Wassail
• Baking a GOOD GF apple pie
• Carmel corn, homemade, the GOOD kind... in the oven.  With or without cinnamon almonds.
• Apple picking?  Can you even do that in Oregon?  If not... skip to next bullet point.
• Home made caramel apples, preferably with apples I PICKED MYSELF.
• Go for a walk in the brisk autumn air, with a friend.  Have a long talk.
• Photo session in a forest or a field.  Pumpkin patch maybe?
• OHEMGEE PUMPKIN PATCH!!!! Preferably with a hayride.

And... that's pretty much my Top 10 Things I HAAAAVE to do this fall.  Good news?  Already checked that first one off, thanks to an activity with my church.  Holla!

Been awhile...

I haven't been posting on my blog.  I tend to clam up when I'm sitting on something.  Time to let a little bit more of my story out into the world.  I'm divorced now... it's official.  Well... I'm officially late in announcing that.  I've been divorced for a little over a month now.  I'm not going to go into the who, what, when, where, and why of my divorce in this post, and probably won't go over it much at ALL on this whole blog.  Suffice it to say, it's not just MY story, it's his as well.  It's not fair for you to only have my side of the story.  Just like it's not fair when people judge me after hearing only his side of the story.  But I don't mind telling you that it's all done, and official, and on paper, and on record with the state.

I can give you basic facts...  We were married for five and a half years.  We were separated for about two months before the divorce was made official by the state, it took (seriously) about two days to a week from the time that we turned in the paperwork to the time we were legally strangers.  Now, we don't talk.  It's okay though.  It's probably better that we don't.  There are a lot of... feelings... and not great ones at that.

But now, I get to start all over with my life.  What a scary thought.  I'm in my mid-twenties, just BARELY starting out in college, embarking on a pathway towards a nursing degree that will take me anywhere from 6-8 years to complete (Family Nurse Practitioner or Certified Nurse Midwife).  It's a tough time to start over, but it's better than never starting at all.  And I know where I'm going, because I know where I've been.

My Freeze Ray...

You know what, Billy?  I feel ya.  Freeze Rays are AWESOME.  And who hasn't wanted to stop the world for a second?

Ahhhhh... MUCH better!

This blog was kinda boring this morning.  And boring blogs KIND of depress me a little.  I've been blogging now for going on 12 years.  TWELVE YEARS people.  Back when it was still relatively easy to do your own code for your blog.  Also, I was in high school... and slightly socially awkward, so I had puh-LEN-ty of free time on my hands in which to write my own code.  Nowadays, not so much time.  So, thanks to those sweethearts over at The Cutest Blog on the Block I have a template that works for me.  It's lemon-y, it's sunshiney, with the right amount of gray to really make the yellows pop... it's a happy template.  And if you don't like it, that's okay.  :-)  It's my blog anyway.  ;-)

Ever get random songs stuck in your head? I DO!

ɹỊɐ-ləq pəllɐɔ umoʇ ɐ ɟo əɔuỊɹd əɥʇ əɯɐɔəq I ʍoɥ noʎ lləʇ ll‚I əɹəɥʇ ʇɥნỊɹ ʇỊs ʇsnỊ əʇnuỊɯ ɐ əʞɐʇ oʇ əʞỊl p‚I puɐ uʍop əpỊsdn pəuɹnʇ ´pəddỊlɟ ʇoნ əɟỊl ʎɯ ʍoɥ ʇnoqɐ llɐ ʎɹoʇs ɐ sỊ sỊɥʇ ʍoN

Music always helps matters...

I'm kinda ridiculously music nerdy.  I've got nice monitor style headphones, I have at least two iPods with me most of the time, I listen to music all day.  It's what I do.  With all the crazy things I'm going through, it's been really interesting to see what songs surface throughout my day.  I'm going to link you to a couple of them today.


This morning, I woke up singing "Fire and Rain" by James Taylor.



"Fire and Rain" has always been a favorite of mine.  I grew up in a musical family, even my Dad (who SAYS he's not musical) always had some Willie Nelson in his truck.  And he'd hum songs, and sing specific lines of songs in context with conversations we were having.  :-)  Mom though, Mom was all about 70's singer-songwriters.  I love Carole King, James Taylor, John Denver, Cat Stevens... love them all.  It's no surprise to me that "Fire and Rain" which really does sum up about what I'm feeling popped into my head this morning.


Won't you look down on me, Jesus
You've got to help me make a stand
You've just got to see me through another day
My body's aching and my time is at hand
And I won't make it any other way






On a less profound note, Hot Chelle Rae's "Tonight, Tonight" has been pretty helpful too.  Nice, clean, fun, bubbly... and exactly how I feel.


La, la, la, whatever
La, la, la, doesn't matter
La, la, la, oh well
La la la




I'm also really loving happy, positive, upbeat music.  I've been using this one as my alarm each morning.  "Rhythm of Love" Plain White T's



When the moon is low
We can dance in slow motion
And all your tears will subside
All your tears will dry




And of course, to finish up this little list, my go-to song when things aren't going the way I'd hoped.  In the words of Mick Jagger, "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you might find you get what you need..."

Deep breath in, and...

Here goes nothing.
Hi.  I'm starting a blog.  I've been around this block before, I know how it works.  I'm just starting a LOT of things over, and I figured that a new blog wouldn't be a bad idea.  I've also decided that I'm starting this story they way I want to start it.  Where I am now... the middle.  I'm sure that I'll talk about the past some too... I mean, sometimes it takes learning where we've come from to truly understand where we are.  And, of course, I'll talk about the future.  But as for me, right now?  You're going to hear my story as I live it.  Storytelling has always been my favorite thing...

Welcome to my story.